The Annual Shu Party
by ZhugeLiangT
Summary: It has arrived again! The Annual Shu Party! Come in and see how they celebrate their Kingdom! This a one shot used for a competition.


"Cannonball!" Zhang Fei shouted as he jumped into the pool which Guan Yu and Liu Bei were already in. The water splashed out all around and knocked over Wei Yan. Liu Bei and Guan Yu both tackled Zhang and dunked him under the water. They all laughed as he struggled around. After a while they let him up and they laughed some more. Wei Yan raised his arms in the air and yelled at Zhang Fei for knocking him over. The three of them in the pool turned around and looked at Wei Yan. They all burst out laughing, which made Wei Yan fume even more.

"Wei Yan, why do you shave your armpits?" Zhang Fei asked. Wei Yan blushed and they all laughed more as he ran off. They then started to hit a ball around to each other.

Inside the Shu meeting hall there were some games, events and activities being held. Xing Cai and Guan Ping were walking around trying to decide what they should do. They then saw a big tub filled with water and had some apples in them. They decide that bobbing for apples would be fun. As they were trying to decide who should go first Liu Chan wandered over to them. He winked at Xing Cai and she giggled.

"What are you two doing?" Liu Chan asked.

"We are about to bob for apples? Would you like to try?" Guan Ping asked. Liu Chan happily nodded. He stuck his head into the water and searched for an apple. After about a minute, Guan Ping bumped into Liu Chan knocking him farther into the tub. Liu Chan jumped out and quickly ran away to dry off. Guan Ping shrugged and Xing Cai squeaked. They decided that they would both go at the same time. Both of them stuck their heads into the tub and searched around. When they lifted their heads they realized they both grabbed the same apple. Xing Cai blushed and ran off.

"What the…?" Guan Ping blinked and walked off.

Over by the garden Zhuge Liang sat with Yue Ying, Zhuge Jin, Zhuge Jun and their wives. Zhuge Jin and Jun both thanked Zhuge Liang for allowing them to come to the Shu party. Zhuge Liang said it was nothing and smiled. They all discussed random topics like how to unite China, which ruler is better than the others, which dynasty they thought would rule over the others, why does Dong Zhuo wear a metal bra, how could they possibly get Europe and America after uniting China and why yaoi is so disgusting. After discussing those topics Zhuge Liang asked them to join them in their kingdom. Zhuge Liang's brothers both agreed to it.

Outside on the gate of the city had a sign with the words 'Shu Party' printed on them for anyone who would like to come in and join it. Everyone was invited, even Wu and Wei, that is if they weren't killed by the raven filled field. The ravens were trained to kill anyone instantly that weren't part of the party. Sadly the ravens got confused and accidentally killed Liu Chan as he ran out through the gates. No one noticed he was gone however so it did not really affect anything.

Back inside Jiang Wei, Zhao Yun and Ma Chao were sitting by the television trying to figure out what to do. They sat there thinking and thinking about what there is the three of them could do. Jiang Wei raised his hand in the air and shouted that he thought of something. He quickly grabbed a jar of strawberry jelly and sat back down.

"Great! Jelly… now what?" Zhao Yun asked him confused.

"Er... I'm not sure actually, that's all I came up with so far. I was hoping the jelly would have inspired one of you guys to think of what we can do with it." They sweatdropped at that comment. Ma Chao looked around.

"Why don't we just play gamecube? There are a bunch of games we could play, Mario Party… Kirby… Metroid Prime… um… I think gamecube has more games…" Ma Chao looked around for other games. Ma Chao grabbed a bunch of boxes and started to count to see how many games there were. He noticed there were only the three games he mentioned so he decided that it was not worth it to play those games.

"Everyone! The costume party is about to begin, hurry up and get your costumes on!" A peasant said to them and then ran off. The spear boys nodded and went off to get their costumes on.

Back over to the apple bobbing area, Guan Ping stood there still wondering what happened. He was about to leave but Zhang Fei blocked the exit. Guan Ping stared at him and asked what he was doing. Zhang Fei was drunk and looked a little mad. Guan Ping asked him again but still got no answer. He looked around and slowly decided to go out the other way. Zhang Fei grabbed his shoulder before he got out of arm reach and spun him around.

"What do you think you were doing with my daughter!" Zhang Fei roared. Guan Ping blinked out of confusion.

"Uh… what?" Guan Ping stammered trying to think of what to say.

"Were you not in here with my daughter just a little while ago!" Zhang Fei yelled at him again. The only thing Guan Ping could do was slowly nod his head. "How dare you get my daughter pregnant!"

"Whaaa?" Guan Ping's eyes grew wide at his comment. "But I didn't get her pregnant?"

"Now you are calling my daughter a liar!" Zhang Fei grabbed him by the throat.

"No… but I… didn't… her… preg… can't… breathe…" Guan Ping tried to say more but with Zhang Fei's hand on his throat not much could come out. Xing Cai ran into the room and asked Zhang Fei to stop so he let go of his throat. Guan Ping rubbed his neck trying to regain his breathing.

"I didn't get you pregnant Xing Cai?" Guan Ping told her.

"Uh huh… we were bobbing for apples and you picked up the same apple as me." Xing Cai blushed and hid her face. Zhang Fei glared at Guan Ping.

"But that--" Guan Ping began.

"Do you deny that it happened?" Zhang Fei quickly interrupted him.

"Well no but--" Guan Ping again tried talking.

"Then you did get her pregnant!" Zhang Fei shouted at him.

"How can someone get pregnant like that? I thought you had to--" Guan Ping started getting frustrated.

"Hey! Don't you even try to finish that sentence. Now since you got my daughter pregnant you will be marrying her." Zhang Fei nodded. Xing Cai gasped and had little hearts floating above her head. "Now I expect you to get her an expensive ring with a big gem on it. Or else…"

Guan Ping sweatdropped and walked out. Xing Cai happily ran off to tell all of her friends that she is going to be married. A man walked over to Zhang Fei and told him that the next game would begin soon. Zhang Fei gasped and ran off. The man then died for some reason.

Outside there was a line drawn across the path and on the ground the word "Start" was written. Zhuge Liang walked over with a horse with Yue Ying and her horse. He smiled at her and waited for the others to come. Zhuge Jin rode over on his donkey and greeted Zhuge Liang and Yue Ying. They began to talk to each other while waiting. After a few minutes Wei Yan came over. He was riding a llama. The three of them looked at him confused.

"Me… like… llama…" Wei Yan told them with a fishface look on his face. They shrugged and talked to each other more. A few more people came, Liu Bei on Hex Mark, Guan Yu on Red Hare, Guan Ping on a goat, Pang Tong on a donkey, Ma Chao on his horse and Liu Chan's horse came over alone, since Liu Chan died already.

"Who is left to come still?" Zhuge Liang asked. Everyone looked around to see who was there and who wasn't.

"Well it looks like Huang Zhong, Zhao Yun, Jiang Wei, Zhang Fei and Xing Cai aren't here?" Ma Chao said to him.

"Oh, alright, Huang Zhong said he wouldn't be participating in this event, but I told him that he could be the one to say go, he should be here soon. Zhao and Jiang also said they wouldn't because they need to work on their costumes for the costume part of the party. But Zhang Fei and Xing Cai should be here. I wonder what is taking them so long to get over here. I would have thought they would have been here on time." Liu Bei said to them checking his watch.

"Brother, Zhang Fei might have gotten into the wine closet again, for all we know he may be passed out on the floor somewhere. It wouldn't be the first time." Guan Yu told him.

"What do you mean? When did he do that?" Liu Bei questioned Guan Yu.

"Last year's celebration he did, and the year before that… and the year before that too…" Guan Yu stroked his beard. Liu Bei smacked his forehead and nodded.

"Well… that is true, but that was then, this is a new year and I think he is doing better now. He hasn't been passed out during a major event in awhile?" Liu Bei smiled.

"He missed my birthday, Jiang's birthday, Zhao's birthday, Christmas, Valentine's Day, Easter…" Guan Yu was saying but got stopped by Liu Bei.

"Wow… you're right, what didn't he miss this year then?" Liu Bei rubbed his forehead. As they were talking, Huang Zhong arrived with a flag and whistle. He walked over to them and talked while Liu Bei and Guan Yu discussed what was going on with Zhang Fei.

"Want me to continue my list?" Guan Yu asked but Liu Bei shook his head. "Well… he made it to the "Wu Sucks" celebration… oh no, that was his son… but he was here for the anniversary of our oath of brotherhood… oh sorry, we just had a cardboard cut out of him so that it would be like he was there… I'm sure he was here for something… yes I know! National Wine Day… no, he got drunk before the festival started and missed it all too… never mind, I guess we can just begin it without him."

They started to line up with their animals across the line to get ready to start the race. Huang Zhong put up the flag. He told them to get ready and to get set, but before he could say go they heard a voice shouting over to them to stop. They all turned their heads to see Zhang Fei in the distance with Xing Cai. Their white rides neighed loudly and stood on their hind legs. Liu Bei looked at Guan Yu and stuck out his tongue at him. The two of them caught up to them and stopped in front of them. Everyone stared at them with wide eyes. Zhang Fei looked confused.

"What kind of horse is that brother? I have never seen such a horse like it?" Guan Yu looked at him shocked.

"I have heard of such a creature in a book I read before. I believe they call it a… a horned horse…" Zhuge Liang stroked his chin to think of the name of it.

"A unicorn, my love?" Yue Ying whispered into his ear. Zhuge Liang nodded and smiled at her.

"That is a unicorn; it is believed to be a rare and mystical creature. How on earth did you get them?" Zhuge Liang asked him curiously.

"Oh? I thought that was just a weird helmet on the horse's head, I wondered why it got so mad when I tried to take it off it. But I just found them in the stable of some peasant. They looked too good for him so I took them out and brought them home with me." Zhang Fei looked proudly. He then took out a helmet and put it on his head telling them that he was ready to begin.

"Er… who are you trying to be with that crescent helmet? An ancient Masamune Date?" Ma Chao laughed at him.

"Who is Masamune Date?" Zhang Fei blinked, confused at his remark.

"Now that you say that, I'm not sure, oh well, let's forget it and start the race." Ma Chao said to him.

Zhang Fei and Xing Cai lined up for the race. Huang Zhong lifted his flag and told them to get ready and to get set. He then blew the whistle and dropped the flag signaling that the race was to begin. They all had their animals go. Guan Yu and Red Hare was off quickly, followed by Ma Chao, Liu Bei, Liu Chan's horse, Zhuge, Yue, Zhang Fei and Xing Cai. Zhuge Jin and Pang Tong were slow off the start, as was Guan Ping on his goat. However, the worst was for Wei Yan, because his llama just stood there.

"We must… go… llama…" He told the llama, but it went nowhere. Wei Yan smacked its butt and told it to go. The llama made no movement. Wei Yan then hopped off the llama and looked at it in the face. "You must… go… time… for race… begun…"

The llama gasped. Wei Yan raised his eyebrow at it and tried pulling on the rope attached to the llama to get it to move. The llama stared at Wei Yan and made funny faces. Wei Yan stared back and asked what it was doing. The llama then spit a large amount of spit in his face, causing him to fall over.

Farther into the race Guan Yu was winning easily. However, Nu Wa rode by with her black horse and Red Hare ran over to her. Red Hare stared at the horse happily and refused to move. Guan Yu sweatdropped as he saw Liu Bei ride by with Hex Mark. Liu Bei laughed but was then thrown off of Hex Mark in disgust. Hex Mark then ran off. Zhuge Liang and Yue were neck and neck in the lead now. Zhuge Liang smiled at Yue and she smiled back. They however decided that they no longer wished to participate in a race and rode off together back to their house. Ma Chao flew past all of them on his horse. He was going so fast that his helmet fell off and he dove to get it, but doing that made his horse fall over and get injured. Liu Chan's horse ran past but got attacked by the ravens like Liu Chan did.

"Wow! We I'm winning!" Zhang Fei shouted excited as he passed them. Xing Cai was close behind him.

"Not if I have anything to say about it dad!" She said laughing as her unicorn passed him. They kept going back and forth with Zhang winning, then Xing Cai winning, over and over again until the unicorns pulled out their wings and flew off with them. They jumped off and landed into the lake.

About a mile back Zhuge Jin and Pang Tong's donkeys were laying on the ground sleeping. Zhuge Jin and Pang Tong were just sitting there talking while drinking water. Guan Ping's goat slowly passed them. However a few minutes later the goat decided to eat the grass and refused to walk any farther. Guan Ping sighed and asked if they wanted to go back to the main hall to wait for the contest to be over. Pang Tong and Zhuge Jin nodded.

Over at the finish line Huang Zhong nearly fell over when he saw Wei Yan and the llama walk past the finish line. He asked them how they could arrive so fast. Wei Yan shrugged.

"We… win?" Wei Yan asked him. Huang Zhong nodded and gave him the trophy for winning the race. They both left to go to get their costumes on and get ready for the next part of the party.

After about an hour they all started to come into the main hall. Liu Bei, Guan Yu and Zhang Fei came in as the three musketeers. Huang Zhong came in as a pirate. Xing Cai came in as a princess. Guan Ping came in as a prince, which he was forced to wear by Zhang Fei so that he would match with Xing Cai. Zhang Bao came in as a knight. Ma Chao came in as a horse, which was not much of a surprise to anyone because he has been a horse for the last three years. Zhuge Liang and Yue Ying came in as a King and Queen. Wei Yan walked in as himself. Pang Tong arrived as a taco. They all started to talk and eat. Zhuge Liang played some music for everyone to enjoy. Finally after about ten minutes after the Pang Tong arrived Zhao Yun came in. He was dressed up with black shirt, blue and white jacket, red and white hat, and sneakers. He had a red ball with a white line across and threw it.

"I choose you! Pikachu!" Zhao Yun shouted as the ball hit the door he came from. Everyone stared at him. "I said… I choose you! Pikachu!"

Silence came through the hall. Zhao Yun sweatdropped and shouted it louder. Then the door slowly opened and Jiang Wei came out in a pikachu costume. They all stared at Jiang Wei. Jiang Wei blushed and sweatdropped at the same time. Zhao Yun glared at him a bit.

"Pika… pika… chu." Jiang Wei said kind of weakly. Some people laughed a bit and others clapped. The music began again and everyone continued having fun while eating, drinking and talking with each other. Huang Zhong then announced that Wei Yan won the race. Everyone sweatdropped because they knew his llama did not move in the beginning and they have no idea how he possibly could have won. Huang Zhong then gave the award of best costume to Pang Tong for being a taco. Zhao Yun frowned because of all the work him and Jiang Wei did for their costume. Huang Zhong then decided to award them with second place, and awarded everyone else for just dressing up.

After the costume party everyone started to go home. They were all tired from the activities that went on during the day and decided that it was late enough for them to go to bed. They also knew that their "Wei Sucks" festival would be next week so they didn't want to be too tired to get things ready for that. As the sun set and moon rose, the day ended another annual Shu party ended successfully.


End file.
